Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
