The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Randomize
