Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
