Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
