Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
