therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
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