I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
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being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
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His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.