Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
