Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
