Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
