i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize