you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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