apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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