I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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