i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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