Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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