why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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