I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
