Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
