i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
