His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
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