READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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