First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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