I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
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