im drinking this country out of the recession.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
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