Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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