Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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