I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
