Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize