I feel great
I just peed on a car
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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