my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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