So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize