My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
