the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize