About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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