I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
