You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
