I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
