Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
