I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize