I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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