I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.