His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.