I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I'm jealous of your bromance
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
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Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
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Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.