I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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