Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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