just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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