Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
