let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
