He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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