I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize