Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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