I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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